Humor & Satire

Student surely, irrefutably knows about everything

By Blair Webber – 2 months ago

In case anyone’s been wondering, I totally know exactly what “decolonize” means and how to use it in a sentence. I know some doubts have been raised on this subject,…

Student sues roommate for heinous breach of contract

By Blair Webber – 2 months ago

Monday afternoon. 4:45 p.m. First-year Jen Anderson returns to her room, a comfortable double she shares with fellow first-year Caroline Jamison, as she always does before meeting her friends for…

Hero student accidentally pays for washer, not dryer

By By Blair Webber – 2 months ago

Most Vassar students dread laundry day. From scraping all of last week’s socks out from underneath the bed to having nowhere to put dirty clothes since the clean ones remain…