Rad Brad’s Career Corner: Career Quiz Edition!

When choosing a career, there are many things to consider. According to The Wall Street Journal, Forbes Magazine, The Economist, Bloomberg Business, Business Insider, Business Week, Yahoo Finance, The New York Times and Efinancialnews.com, this quiz is the #1 Best Way to determine which career is right for you.

1. Social Environment

A) I thrive when subjected to at least nine hours of crippling isolation a day

B) I love feeling frazzled and completely stressed out by 10 a.m. and overstimulated by entitled customers

C) It doesn’t matter, as long as I am allowed to keep my impressive collection of succulents in the business basement

2. Time Commitment

A) Work is a refuge from my highly sensitive, high-needs dachshund

B) I am a trust fund baby, so I don’t plan to work more than two hours a week for the rest of my life

C)It doesn’t matter, as long as I am allowed to keep my impressive collection of succulents in the business basement

3. Pay

A) I plan to take up miserly money-hoarding by no later than age 29

B) Exploit me, nonprofit sector!

C) In just a few years, the U.S. currency as we know it will never be the same…

4. Satisfaction

A) No matter what, I’ll be as unhappy as a succulent plant in the business basement

B) After two years in the field, my hope is to turn my job experience into a New York Times best-selling memoir that inspires millions

C) I have no emotions

5. Outlet for Creativity

A) Choosing which salad greens to eat at the deece already strains my creative capacity

B) I’m a creative genius just waiting to be discovered…still waiting…………

C) I’ve had couture iceberg and arugula salad dresses walk the runways at Paris Fashion Week

If you picked mostly “A”s…You’re a Dental Hygienist! Your only good quality is an openness to the world around you, a shy curiosity that draws others to you. As a dental hygienist, you could explore the oral cavities of those in your chair, charming them with your quiet interest. We recommend that you avoid partnering with a sales associate at all costs. Your dispositions would clash horribly and cause your less-fine qualities of forgetfulness, sleepiness and self-centeredness to shine through.

If you picked mostly “B”s…You’re the Company Accountant! You’re always the first to tell others about depressing world events, and you have a charisma unbeknownst to anyone, including yourself, that will probably remain hidden for the entirety of your life. As company accountant, you will break barriers while making calculations you have probably done several times before. Avoid other best-selling novelists, as they will only take away from your fame and fortune.

If you picked mostly “C”s…You are a Dachshund/Desert Botanist/Salad Green! Embrace your inner spirit animals and vegetables as you uncertainly navigate the harshest of Earth’s ecosystems. You are a vibrant, outspoken political critic who deigns to socialize with less talented creatures. Trust your instincts. Avoid at all costs interacting with physicians, as this could result in explosive verbal arguments. And take fair warning—choosing this career path will not make family relations any easier: Skeptical of your career goals, aunts and uncles may end up being condescending and herbivorous.

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