Library opens 24-hour section for three more hours a day

Image courtesy of Benjamin Savel '26.

With students feeling the crunch of tests, quizzes, papers and projects during the heat of midterms, the library has announced that it will open the 24-hour section for three more hours per day to accommodate students who need more time to study. The change comes as an immense relief for students who could use a few more minutes to finish their big projects and claim they can do it without regard for sleep, social interaction or the laws of physics.

Students have expressed excitement at the new available hours. In a series of interviews with The Miscellany News, several informed the newspaper of their intended usage for the new section. “I’ll use it to procrastinate for three more hours before I freak out that I didn’t study enough for my test,” Thyme M. Anagement ’25 stated.

Frequent users of the 24-hour section are well aware of the talking ID card reader that shouts at any Vassar student who walks through its doors. During the library’s extended hours, the ID card reader will shout even louder to make sure it simultaneously disturbs everyone in the library and wakes up at least 25 people in the surrounding buildings. Asked why they decided to pioneer the shouting ID card reader in the library, an official stated that this was one of the best buildings available to test it out. “What, it’s not like it’s a library or anything,” Parah Dahaxi Kahl, Senior Planning Manager for Library Chaos, stated.

The 24-hour section, now more popular than ever, has an entrance that looks like a pool deck lounge, a full-on make-your-own cappuccino vending machine and an adjacent one containing M&Ms, soda, chips and candy bars, which prompted library staff to assure The Miscellany News that it is not a seaside resort. Library officials also have stated that these vending machines are the pinnacle of their commitment to discourage snacking in the library.

Other students, however, plan to use the new hours for more academic purposes. “I’ll use it to do more research on my term paper, because we all know that the best research comes after you’ve stayed up for 27 hours straight and your eyes are struggling to stay open,” another student named Yahawn Ing ‘25 proudly asserted. 

Asked why the library chose 27 hours, a library staff member stated, “We did our best. There are only so many hours in a day.”

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