Thumb-shaped faces, dead animals: Tindering in Ohio
As I merged onto I-84 West during my drive from Poughkeepsie to my hometown of Bainbridge, Ohio at the end of my junior year, I shed four tragic tears. The…
Humor & Satire
Jaded senior offers glimpse into Class of 2018’s future
I remember how I felt before the start of my first year at Vassar: palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy, etc. etc. And I imagine that many of…
Former frosh offers tips to navigate orientation week, aka the only time you will be close to your fellow group
Hello there, Class of 2018, and welcome to Camp Vassar! Freshman Orientation is a time when you get to awkwardly socialize with your fellow group (yay!), awkwardly socialize with your…
Mr. Gonzalez says ‘K, thx’ to 2014
Whenever I sit down to write a humor piece I begin by crying into my blanket and thinking about all the mean things my daddy used to say to me.…
Lilian Doyle, Esq. passes down years of VC wisdom
As my family, close friends, periphery friends, potential employers, professors and my hairdresser keep reminding me, I’m graduating from college in a month! How great. I have, as my Federal…
The Misc Guide to: staying friends with soon-to-be alums
Convocation was yesterday, and tonight, at 7:13 p.m., I will be ringing the bell on top of Main, symbolizing my transition from a lowly Deece Jell-O-addicted junior to a senior…
Maddy knows about the pains of your #DeeceLife
It’s the end of the year, and I ran out of dining bucks like three weeks ago, so my dining options are rather limited to the Deece, Express Lunch or…
Humor editor only person alive never offered a cig
I have never been offered a cigarette. Not a single time. Seriously, not once. If you’re reading this right now, and you’re like hey, Lily, we are close personal friends…
The Misc says goodbye to best EIC since ’Nam
Since the end of last April, I have devoted my mind, body and sexual appetite to a higher power, The Miscellany News, and as odd and questionable my decision to…
VC’s Sophie’s Choice: Beer or Meryl Streep
You know the situation: You’re in a Costco with your great-grandmother, casually stealing extra free samples from the cheese case. Suddenly, a thought strikes her and she turns to you…