Acclaimed Netflix critic hits rock bottom in latest reviews
Over the break, I had much more free time than usual, compounded with an almost overpowering need to hide from my family. I ended up logging a lot of quality…
Humor & Satire
House of Cards’ protagonist enters the presidential race
On April 1, Frank Underwood declared his decision to run in the 2016 presidential race. In an exclusive interview with The Miscellany News, Underwood explained his sudden decision to run…
Student blogs Tinder activity from download to deletion
Ah, spring break! 14 straight days to do whatever my antisocial heart desires. I can wake up at 2 p.m. and take a nap at 3 p.m. I can finally…
Security writes up wily agent Bond Hill at 007 deadly sins
FRIGID SIN HOLE, N.Y.— As the festivities for the Jewett House Team event “Seven Deadly Sins” got underway on Friday night, party-goers may have noticed some weirdness during the night.…
Nation untouched by “Jeb!” campaign’s drawn out death
Jeb Bush’s presidential campaign died quietly in its sleep Saturday, Feb. 20, 2016. The campaign finally found peace after a long, hard fought battle with not getting enough votes. Jeb…
Odysseus laments his nominal link to the Odyssey Online
I’ve been through ordeals that would be unthinkable to you millennials. While you were confined to the library computers because you spilled Cafe Kilimanjaro on your MacBook, I was held…
Tasty’s homologue lowers standards for collegiate demographic
In collaboration with Buzzfeed, the producers of the increasingly popular “Tasty” videos (featured on Facebook) are working on a new project. The new series, wittily entitled “Nasty,” attempts to create…
Astrophysicists discover that Einstein was really smart
Recently, readers of the internationally acclaimed Science Journal “I fucking love science” were shocked to see that yet another thing they hadn’t heard about had been discovered. Researches at LIGO,…
Millennials turn to internet for answers on how to interact with other humans
Dear Ask Banner, Help! My ex-boyfriend from home is visiting Vassar, as he might apply here, and I just ran into him in the College Center! I saw him first…
Sexual frustration reaches climax through social media
The sexuality investigator This post is definitely questionable for its potential to out someone to their entire Facebook friend list. What happened to the days of subtly turning conversations around…