Try New Year’s Resolutions that are morally questionable!
Every New Year’s Eve as the clock ticks closer and closer to midnight, everyone seems to ask themselves the same general questions: “Who will I be in the New Year?”…
Humor & Satire
You really shouldn’t have: when gifts become forced
When any well-intentioned individual proudly hands me an object wrapped in bright paper and adorned with a shiny bow, I experience a gnawing sense of foreboding. It’s comparable to the…
Role on Exec Board proves funnier than Humor articles
It could not be more appropriate that I am writing this article during a hectic Tuesday production night, a time that is supposed to be reserved for editing. When I…
If you’re too lazy to reinvent yourself, here are a few ideas
Three, two, one… as the clock strikes midnight, you step forward into the light and come face to face with your reflection in the mirror. Placing your palm against the…
Rad Brad’s Career Corner: Career Quiz Edition!
When choosing a career, there are many things to consider. According to The Wall Street Journal, Forbes Magazine, The Economist, Bloomberg Business, Business Insider, Business Week, Yahoo Finance, The New…
How to celebrate Hanukkah in the anti-Promised Land
It has been universally decided that 2016 has been one of the worst years in the history of humanity. Donald Trump’s election, the mass shooting in a gay nightclub in…
Advice for college from your weird younger bro Thaddeus
As a junior in college, you would think that I am prepared to handle the conclusion of my fifth semester, but over Thanksgiving break, I found myself more stressed about…
In time for finals, check out these places to cry at Vassar
Do you like winter because it means everyone is as sad as you are year-round? Are you stressed out about finals? Cuffing season not going as you’d planned? If crying…
Take our personality quiz: how ready are you for winter break?
Thanksgiving break is always such a tease. You go back home for a few days, fill yourself with food and pretend that the historical implications of this genocide… I mean…
Kylie Jenner given deserved award for the first time
WASHINGTON, D.C.— Today I witnessed the first-ever presentation of the Presidential Medal of Fortune Telling. The recipient of the medal was none other than Kylie Jenner. She was praised for…