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Day: February 1, 2023
Horoscopes
Aries Examine your vices and guilty pleasures this week. Are the things you like guilty pleasures because they are traditionally liked by teenage girls, or are they actually worth a…
Making things weird: An admirable 2023 resolution
It is no secret that everyone’s sense of humor is unique and different, and what we find funny varies greatly based on the person. Some find humor in cynicism, some…
I miss the old Express: A lament rooted in disappointment
It has been a little over five months since Express lost the right to serve hot food, an experiment which has, at best, made me very sad. For the majority…
An exclusive interview with the Phantom Pisser
Reader, I have scoured everywhere in order to write this article. I have searched high and low for this fantastic fiend and their unique urethra, and I have finally found…
The story of how I won the storage wars
Most Vassar students make one crucial mistake during their time here: acquiring possessions. Oh, yes, it seems like a good idea to buy a towel to dry yourself off with,…
Unusual Lodging
The residents dare not inquire Why she spends every day on the spire; The last one who asked Unnaturally passed When she unleashed a monstrous lyre. – Anna Kozloski
Coming to terms with a field not designed for you
Classical music has been held up by many as a bastion of Western culture, and, by some accounts, it is—the great works of compositional masters demonstrate what humans can achieve…
Mindset change needed in age of COVID-19
The last several years of COVID-19 have been peppered with the phrase “when things go back to normal.” When things go back to normal, we’ll be able to go to…
Chiefs, Eagles to face off in the big game
The 2022 NFL season was full of crazy ups and downs, but now we are left with two teams remaining: the Kansas City Chiefs and the Philadelphia Eagles. Although this…